Veggie Might: Quick Red Posole with Beans

Written by the fabulous Leigh, Veggie Might is a weekly Thursday column about all things Vegetarian.

Remember back in the spring when I lamented the lack of shelf space for any more cookbooks? I began a project to separate the wheat from the chaff so I could make room for new and exciting titles. (So far, I’ve managed to eliminate none.)

Then in the summer, a darling friend gave me two new cookbooks for my birthday, real estate be damned, and one that I’d been dreaming of. (That’s a real friend. Thanks LB!) Immediately the cookbook culling project stalled because I just can’t stop cooking from Viva Vegan! by Terry Hope Romano. In two months, I’ve made at least seven of the recipes, and some of them twice.

Quick Red Posole with Beans has become a fast favorite. Just like it claims, it’s a snap to make: from prep to table, it takes just about an hour. While I would normally use dried beans and fresh tomatoes, their canned cousins are welcome substitutes when time is a premium.

And by all things Divine and holy, it is delicious. Warm, spicy but not too hot, and tangy, the hominy is a chewy delight playing off the creamy beans. My family ate hominy as a plain side dish next to green beans and chicken, but this is deeply flavorful hominy I can get used to.

Of course, I made a few substitutions. I reduced the oil from two tablespoons to one, subbed regular oregano for Mexican, and sent in a fresh jalapeño and smoked paprika for the ancho chili powder. That last one was a good call.

Because it is easy, fast, and infinitely scalable with supreme leftover potential, Quick Red Posole with Beans is super for a weeknight supper, potluck entree, or (sing along) last-minute lunch.

In short order, Viva Vegan! has earned its place on my crowded cookbook shelf. Now what to do about Cooking with “Friends”?

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If you like this recipe, you may enjoy:
Nopales (Cactus) Chili
Nuyorican Rice and Beans
Camp Stove Chili

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Quick Posole with Beans

Adapted from Viva Vegan! by Terry Hope Romano
Serves 4
1 tbsp olive oil
4 cloves garlic, minced
1 large yellow onion, diced
1 poblano pepper, seeded and diced
1 jalapeño pepper, seeded and diced
1 tsp dried cumin
1 1/2 tsp dried Mexican oregano
1 tsp ancho chili powder (or smoked paprika)
28 oz can diced tomatoes
15 oz can hominy (posole)
15 oz can pinto beans (or black beans)
1 cup Mexican beer or vegetable stock
1 tsp salt (or to taste)
1 tbsp lime juice

Instructions
1. In a large sauce pan, heat oil over medium heat and saute garlic about 30 seconds. Then add onions and peppers. Cook until soft, about 8 minutes.

2. Add tomatoes, beans, hominy, spices, and beer or stock to vegetables. Reduce heat and simmer for 25 minutes, stirring occasionally.

3. Remove from heat, drizzle in lime juice, add fresh pepper, and allow to rest for 10 minutes so flavors may combine.

4. Serve in bowls topped with fresh cilantro or tomatoes and tortillas. Prep yourself for accolades.

Approximate Calories, Fat, Fiber, Protein, and Price per Serving
210.5 calories, 4.7g fat, 7.4g fiber, 6.9g protein, $1.45

Note: I used canned beans instead of dried to save time rather than money. Your cost will be less if using dried beans.

Calculations
1 tbsp olive oil: 120 calories, 14g fat, 0g fiber, 0g protein, $0.08
4 cloves garlic: 16.8 calories, 0g fat, 0g fiber, 0g protein, $0.05
1 large yellow onion: 40 calories, 0.2g fat, 0g fiber, 0g protein, $0.50
1 poblano pepper: 17 calories, 0g fat, 1g fiber, 0.5g protein, $0.50
1 jalapeño pepper: 4 calories, 0g fat, 0g fiber, 0g protein, $0.16
1 tsp cumin: negligible calories, fat, fiber, protein, $.02
1 1/2 tsp oregano: negligible calories, fat, fiber, protein, $.02
1 tsp smoked paprika: negligible calories, fat, fiber, protein, $.02
28 oz can diced tomatoes: 132 calories, 0g fat, 6g fiber, 6g protein, $1.99
15 oz can hominy: 178.5 calories, 1.5g fat, 6g fiber, 3g protein, $1.19
15 oz can pinto beans: 309 calories, 3g fat, 16.5g fiber, 18g protein, $0.99
1 cup vegetable stock: 20 calories, 0.1g fat, 0g fiber, 0g protein, $0.19
1 tsp salt: negligible calories, fat, fiber, protein, $.02
fresh ground pepper: negligible calories, fat, fiber, protein, $.02
1 tbsp lime juice: 4.75 calories, 0g fat, 0g fiber, 0g protein, $0.05
TOTALS: 842 calories, 18.8g fat, 29.5g fiber, 27.5 protein, $5.80
PER SERVING (totals/4): 210.5 calories, 4.7g fat, 7.4g fiber, 6.9g protein, $1.45

The Sweet Stuff, Part 3: Nectar of the Gods

Part 3 of a 3-part series about sugar and sugar substitutes.

Over the past two weeks, in our quest to unlock the mysteries of sweeteners, we have covered the calorie-free-but-mostly-chemical (though I still heartily vouch for stevia’s naturalosity if you buy organic) and real sugar, both refined and raw(ish). But there remains a pantheon of sweeteners yet unexamined: the gooey, sticky syrups.

Liquid sweeteners are versatile and ubiquitous. But, just as it goes with their crystalline cousins, few liquid sweeteners are untouched by human hands before they reach our supermarket shelves or farmer’s market stalls.

So what’s the buzz about the sticky sweetness?

Photo: Vicky Brock via flickr

Honey
Honey is produced by the synergy between bees and flowers. Bees collect nectar from the flowers in their mouths, mixing it with enzymes, and then deposit the resulting sweet stuff in little pockets of wax back at the hive.

Before it’s processed, raw honey is loaded with phytonutrients, trace minerals, and antioxidants depending upon flower diversity. Honey has been shown to relieve cough and treat cuts, but should not be given to children under the age of one.

Molasses
Molasses, as we covered briefly last week, is made from cane or beet sugar. The juice is extracted, the remaining crystals are removed, and a dark, thick syrup remains. Also known as treacle, molasses is most commonly used in baking and cooking. A gingerbread man would not be the same without rich molasses.

Molasses comes in three grades:
Light or Barbados Molasses: From the first pressing of the sugarcane, this is the lightest in color, sweetest, and mildest variety, often used as pancake syrup or to sweeten beverages.
Dark Molasses: From the second pressing of the sugarcane, dark molasses is less sweet and has a stronger flavor than light. It is most commonly used in baking and cooking.
Blackstrap Molasses: From the third processing of the sugarcane and used mostly as an iron supplement, blackstrap molasses is considered too strong and bitter for baking. Trust me, my favorite ginger cookies and I learned this the hard way.
Unsulfered vs. Sulfured: Unsulfured molasses is free of sulfur dioxide, a preservative to improve shelf life. Sulfured molasses is not quite as sweet as unsulfured.

Photo: My Lil' Rotten via flickr

Maple Syrup
Maple syrup, the pride of the Great White North, is produced from the sap of maple trees. The process is fairly simple: sap is collected from a tapped tree, boiled to evaporate the water, and poured through a filter to remove any nasty bits. The longer the sap is boiled, the darker and sweeter the syrup.

Maple syrup, with its myriad uses, is classified into four grades, based on color, not quality:
Grade A Fancy or Light Amber: light golden color, subtle maple flavor, used for the table
Grade A Medium Amber: golden color, more distinct maple flavor, used for the table
Grade A Dark Amber: light russet color, rich maple flavor, used for the table and cooking/baking
Grade B: deep russet color, strongest maple flavor, used for the table, best grade for cooking/baking

Corn Syrup
Oh corn syrup. There is so much confusion about you. First of all, corn syrup and high-fructose corn syrup are different beasts. Corn syrup is derived from cornstarch, and while often called glucose syrup, the latter can be made from the starch of just about any other grain.

Corn syrup, both the dark and light varieties, is a Southern staple for making pecan pie. My grandmother’s pantry was never without it. We used the “maple” version for pancakes too. Light corn syrup is often used in candy making. Bonus Halloween Fake Blood Recipe: Mix 3 parts corn syrup to 1 part clear dishwashing liquid. Add red food coloring until desired color is achieved. Apply wherever fake blood is required. (Since it’s partially soap-based, it will wash out of clothes.)

Corn syrup’s evil twin, high fructose corn syrup, is corn syrup that as been chemically altered to increase the percentage of fructose which heightens its sweetness. HFCS became widespread in mass food production because a little bit goes a long way. So much so that a recent Princeton University study showed that “[a]nimals with access to high-fructose corn syrup gained 48 percent more weight than those eating a normal diet.”

Agave Nectar
Agave nectar is another highly controversial sweetener. Juice (or sap) from the agave cactus is boiled down, and, depending on the processor, treated with enzymes to increase sweetness and viscosity. Whether this process is as highly refined as that of table sugar or more “natural” is still up for debate.

Agave nectar can be found in light and dark varieties and, because of its neutral flavor, is a favorite in cooking and baking. It also dissolves easily in cold fluid, so it works well as drink sweetener.

Agave’s problems arise from being touted as a “low-glycemic” sweetener, perfect for diabetics and people watching their blood sugar. Well, agave nectar is primarily fructose, and the glycemic index only measures glucose. Do you see where I’m going? So while it rates low on the GI scale, it’s still a sugar, with the same calories as sugar, and and should be eaten in moderation, just like sugar. Sorry for the buzzkill; or maybe I just made your day.

Sweeteners, Health, and The Glycemic Index
The Glycemic Index ranks carbohydrates on a scale of 1 to 100 by the amount they raise our blood glucose levels. According to the Glycemic Index Foundation, “Choosing low GI carbs...is the secret to long-term health, reducing your risk of heart disease and diabetes and is the key to sustainable weight loss.”

* Low GI = 55 or less
* Medium GI = 56 – 69
* High GI = 70 or more

Cane sugar scores about 65, while agave comes in around 27 and HFCS around 89. Maple syrup is the most competitive, logging in at 54, while honey ranks between 65 and 83. You can see why, at a glance, agave nectar and maple syrup look healthier.

But not everyone agrees that the Glycemic Index is the best way to judge a food. It doesn’t account for how food is prepared, how much is eaten, or the fiber content of foods. For instance, there is a huge difference between the way your body metabolizes an agave-sweetened iced tea, a maple-syrup-sweetened granola bar, or a sugar-sweetened cookie.

In some ways, natural sweeteners like honey and maple syrup are the healthier choice than refined sugar. Since their production processes are less intense, the trace minerals remain. But they are still sugars, and the moderation song keeps coming on the radio because it has universal appeal. It might not be the most danceable tune, but it’s one we can all sing along to.

The Sweet Stuff in Action
Now that we know what we’re dealing with, how do we apply this knowledge in the kitchen? Well, I found two great guides to sweetener substitutions for cooking and baking: this simple, straightforward chart (thanks JBF!) and this more in-depth table, complete with notes on flavor and how to tweak baking soda quantities. Here’s a quick and dirty summary:

Alternative to Refined White Sugar Ratio
1 cup to 1 cup : turbinado, Sucanat, demerara
3/4 cup to 1 cup: honey, maple syrup, agave nectar; decrease liquid by 3 tbsp to 1/4 cup
1 1/4 cup to 1 cup: molasses; decrease liquid by 5 tbsp

Now go bake something sweet, healthy, and good!

Resources/Further Reading
The World’s Healthiest Foods
Mayo Clinic Expert Answers: Diabetes
A Sweet Problem: Princeton researchers find that high fructose corn syrup prompts significantly higher weight gain
Fooducate: Eight Facts about Agave Nectar
Grist: The Low-down on Agave and Other Natural Sweeteners

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If this article tipped your canoe, float on over to
The Sweet Stuff, Part 1: A New Color in the Packet Rainbow
The Sweet Stuff, Part 2: White, Brown, and Sparkly Crystals
Mmm...Is for Maple Ginger Applesauce

Green Kitchen: Bacony Tempeh and Fresh String Beans

Green Kitchen is a bi-weekly column about nutritious, inexpensive, and ethical food and cooking. It’s penned by the lovely Jaime Green.

Although I became a vegetarian when I was fifteen, it wasn't until almost ten years later, when I started visiting my local farmers market, that I learned to love vegetables. What I don't talk about as much is how long it took me to get my protein healthily and deliciously, too.

For many years I lived on processed fake meats – veggie burgers, chik patties, and immitation lunchmeats. They tasted good(ish), and I knew what to do with them. (Okay, I admit – Morningstar's chik patties taste amazing.) They have respectable protein numbers, and I figured that was good enough for me.

But processed food is processed food. That's one big way mock meat differs from the real thing – fresh, humane, grass-fed meat is a pretty awesome food. Reconstituted, flavored, and styled soy protein? Not so much.

Oh, and also there's the $5-a-box price tag. Ouch.

So in the last several years I've gotten to know tempehs, tofus, and seitans (and cottage cheeses and eggs). I learned – finally! – to press tofu, and cook it hot and fast; I made my own seitan. Tempeh, tofu's healthier, meatier cousin, has its own flavor and bite.

But even now, as I type the word “tempeh,” I see the supermarket case, the packages of tempeh and one variety with an enticing, bright red label. It holds about half as much food as the others, and costs almost twice as much, but man, does that label make it seem worthwhile.

Tempeh Bacon.

No, it does not taste like bacon. Nothing does. (Though good, crispy Brussels sprouts seem to, I swear, satisfy something similar.) But these thin strips of smoky, savory tempeh make my vegetarian mouth water.

And so, like a good and frugal vegetarian, I set out to learn how to make it myself. The strip shape wasn't important to me; the delicious, bacon-adjacent flavor was.

It turns out that what was missing from all my years of marinating and cooking my foods was this:

Liquid smoke. Made by running smoke through water (and then filtering out the nasty stuff), it adds that je ne sais quois, which we actually know exactly what it quois – smokiness. Bacon gets it by, you know, being smoked. My tempeh gets a few drops of this elixir. Boom.

I've been tweaking and playing around with this recipe for months, and just about every variation (dictated by what’s in my fridge) has been delicious. A tablespoon or two of maple syrup doesn't make it too sweet but adds a great layer to the flavor. Less ketchup or nutritional yeast makes the marinade thinner and less strongly savory. Play with the spices, play with the sauce. It doesn't taste exactly like bacon, but that's become sort of beside the point now. What it does taste like is good.

This recipe makes a bit more sauce than needed to cover one package's worth of tempeh. Once the tempeh was browned (ahem, very browned, sadly, in this execution), I added a bunch of trimmed string beans and a splash more oil. I sauteed until the beans were bright and just barely cooked – the freshness of their flavor plays nicely with the strong, salty sauce and tempeh. Also, the pretty green beans distract from the fact that some of my tempeh's on the blackened side of golden. Luckily, still delicious.

This sauce works brilliantly, too, as a tofu marinade. Just press the tofu well first, for at least half an hour, and let it sit at least overnight. Whereas tempeh's got its own flavor, tofu needs to really absorb the sauce. After that it's basically the same thing – cook it fast and hot, get a good brown on the outside, and enjoy.

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If you enjoyed this recipe, you may also like
Seitan: Make Your Own Meat
BBQ Seitan Bites
Tofu Bahn Mi (Spicy Vietnamese Sandwiches)

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Bacony Tempeh with String Beans

Serves 3

1 package tempeh, cubed (I used Lightlife Flax tempeh)
1 lb (or so) string beans (about 3 cups)

Marinade
2 T canola or other neutral oil (plus a bit more for sauteeing)
3 T soy sauce or tamari
2 T ketchup
2 T apple cider vinegar
¾ t liquid smoke
1 T nutritional yeast
½ t cumin
½ t hot paprika
½ t powdered ginger
a few dashes garlic powder
one dash nutmeg

Instructions

1. Combine marinade in a bowl or a resealable container. Whisk (or shake) to combine. Add the tempeh. Toss (or shake) to cover. Refrigerate for at least 30 minutes, up to a day or two.

2. Heat a splash of oil in a skillet over medium-high heat. Add tempeh, saving extra sauce, and cook, tossing or stirring every so often, until the tempeh is hot and somewhere between golden and browned on all sides.

3. Lower heat to medium. Add string beans and remaining sauce, plus another little splash of oil if you need it (and a tiny splash of water if your beans are dry). Cook covered, stirring or tossing every so often, so nothing burns, until beans are bright green and soft, about five minutes.

Approximate Calories, Fat, Fiber, Protein, and Price Per Serving
346.7 calories, 20.4g fat, 12.1g fiber, 18.6g protein, $1.62

Calculations
1 package tempeh: 460 calories, 18g fat, 22g fiber, 40g protein, $2.49
1 lb string beans: 102 calories, 0.4g fat, 11.2g fiber, 6g protein, $1.50
3 T canola: 371 calories, 42g fat, 0g fiber, 0g protein, $0.15
3 T tamari: 32 calories, 0.1g fat, 0.4g fiber, 5.7g protein, $0.27
2 T ketchup: 29 calories, 0.1g fat, 0.1g fiber, 0.5g protein, $0.07
2 T apple cider vinegar: 6 calories, 0g fat, 0g fiber, 0g protein, $0.08
¾ t liquid smoke: 0 calories, 0g fat, 0g fiber, 0g protein, $0.08
1 T nutritional yeast: 27 calories, 0.3g fat, 1.7g fiber, 3g protein, $0.19
½ t cumin: 4 calories, 0.2g fat, 0.4g fiber, 0.2g protein, $0.01
½ t hot paprika: 3 calories, 0.1g fat, 0.4g fiber, 0.2g protein, $0.01
½ t powdered ginger: 3 calories, 0.1g fat, 0.1g fiber, 0.1g protein, $0.02
a few dashes garlic powder: 1 calorie, 0g fat, 0.1g fiber, 0.1g protein, $0.01
one dash nutmeg: 0 calories, 0g fat, 0g fiber, 0g protein, $0.01

TOTAL: 1040 calories, 61.3g fat, 36.4g fiber, 55.7g protein, $4.89
PER SERVING (TOTAL/3): 346.7 calories, 20.4g fat, 12.1g fiber, 18.6g protein, $1.62

Ask the Internet: What Can I Use to Replace Mayo?

Darling Readers, last week you sure came through with emergency lunch ideas. The most popular responses were Hummus & Veggies and Leftovers. Check out the comments for more fabulous reader suggestions for quick, on-the-go meals. This week's question comes from reader Leigh-Ann. She, like our beloved Kris, is a soldier in the No Mayo Army and needs our help. (She also has a rockin' name.)

Question: What can I use instead in recipes that call for mayo? I know that in most dips you can't taste the mayo, and it's just used for the consistency. However, I would prefer to never use it in any capacity and a helpful substitute would be great!

Answer: From one Leigh to another, I must be honest; I enjoy mayo. HOWEVER, I eat it sparingly, only when it's absolutely required, and only when it's really good. The rest of the time, I make a vegan version from tofu, vegetable oil, mustard, salt and pepper. It's a super replacement for the real mayonnaise so many of you find repulsive. You might also try sour cream or heavy cream depending on the recipe. My dad uses heavy cream in his BBQ slaw.

Readers, mayo-haters and -lovers alike, what suggestions do you have for the lovely named Leigh-Ann? Do you have any experience substituting the offending egg whip? If anyone can make her mayo-free dreams come true, you can!

Want to ask the interweb a question? Post one in the comment section, or write to Cheaphealthygood@gmail.com. Then, tune in next Tuesday for an answer/several answers from the good people of the World Wide Net.

Whole Wheat Scones with Corn, Tomato, and Basil

Today on Serious Eats: Mexican Potato Soup. This soup is so fast, easy, and out-of-this-world delicious, it’ll make you believe in time travel, Nostradamus, and Yeti.

Summer is winding down, and a fall nip is in the air. It’s still warm enough to find ripe, juicy tomatoes and sweet corn at the market and cool enough to turn on the oven. There is no better time to whip up a batch of savory scones.

Scones are my Charming Boyfriend’s favorite breakfast bread, and turns out, they’re incredibly easy to make. CB prefers the classic raisin version, but I like something a little more savory. I’ve been tweaking and fine-tuning this scone recipe, from Vegan with a Vengence by Isa Chandra Moskowitz, for a few months now.

We’ve had such a gorgeous bounty of corn and tomatoes this season, I couldn’t resist stuffing a batch of scones with gold and red, inspired by the chewy, speckled corn breads I grew up with.

To stand up to the filling, I subbed in whole wheat flour and went with a nonhydrogenated shortening instead of oil to give the scones a flakier texture. I compensated with a little extra almond milk to make up for the moisture loss.

Another little trick of this recipe is to combine the almond (or soy or rice) milk with vinegar: the classic vegan method for substituting buttermilk. The vinegar curdles the nondairy milk, giving it a similar sour flavor to buttermilk. The real deal would work fine in place of the vegan version.

The fragrance of basil will fill your kitchen (or whole apartment) when these come out of the oven. Moist and flaky, a touch sweet from the corn, and tangy with tomatoes, these scones are the perfect complement to a weekend brunch. And with the more substantial whole wheat flour and veggies, they make an ideal grab-and-go breakfast bread.

Give these scones a try while the fruits and veggies of summer are still with us. But hurry! The corn is going fast. (Oh Eve Arden, that made me so sad.) Maybe scones will become your favorite breakfast bread too.

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If you dug this recipe, point your divining rod to
Vegan Bran Muffins
Zucchini Bread
Tofu Veggie Scramble

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Whole Wheat Scones with Corn and Tomatoes

Adapted from Vegan with a Vengence by Isa Chandra Moskowitz
Makes 16 scones

3 cups whole wheat flour
2 tbsp baking powder
1 tsp salt
2 tbsp sugar
1/3 cup nonhydrogenated shortening
1 1/2 cup almond milk + 2 tsp apple cider vinegar (vegan buttermilk!)
1 cup cooked corn (fresh from the cob or frozen)
1 cup tomatoes, fresh diced
2 tbsp basil, fresh chopped

Instructions
1. Preheat oven to 400 and lightly grease a cookie sheet.

2. Combine flour, baking powder, salt, sugar and into a large mixing bowl.

3. With a fork, cut shortening into flour mixture. Leaving pea-sized bits of shortening will make a flakier scone.

4. In a measuring cup, combine 1 1/2 cup almond milk and 2 tsp apple cider vinegar. Stir until milk coagulates. Fold in milk-vinegar combo, corn, tomatoes, and basil. Mix until just combined, taking care not to overwork the dough.

5. Turn out dough onto lightly floured surface and shape into a circular mound, about 12” in diameter.

6. With a sharp knife, cut the mound in half, then the halves into quarters, and so on, pizza-style, until you have 16 pieces.

7. Transfer dough to cookie sheet and bake for 12 to 15 minutes.

8. Remove from oven and allow to cool for 10 to 15 minutes. Enjoy with a fabulous breakfast or as a midnight snack.

Approximate Calories, Fat, Fiber, Protein, and Price per Serving
127.25 calories, 4.2g fat, 3.15g fiber, 3.15g protein, $0.24

Calculations
3 cups whole wheat flour: 1221 calories, 6g fat, 48g fiber, 48g protein, $1.08
2 tbsp baking powder: negligible calories, fat, fiber, protein, $0.04
1 tsp salt: negligible calories, fat, fiber, protein, $0.02
2 tbsp sugar: 52 calories, 0g fat, 0g fiber, 0g protein, $0.04
1/3 cup nonhydrogenated shortening: 500 calories, 55g fat, 0g fiber, 0g protein, $0.60
1 1/2 cup almond milk:: 60 calories, 4.5g fat, 1.5g fiber, 1.5g protein, $0.75
2 tsp apple cider vinegar: 2 calories, 0g fat, 0g fiber, 0g protein, $0.01
1 cup cooked corn: 177 calories, 2g fat, 0g fiber, 0g protein, $0.75
1 cup tomatoes: 22 calories, 0g fat, 1g fiber, 1g protein, $0.50
2 tbsp basil: 2 calories, 0g fat, 0g fiber, 0g protein, $0.08
Totals: 2036 calories, 67.5g fat, 50.5g fiber, 50.5g protein, $3.87
Per serving (Totals/16): 127.25 calories, 4.2g fat, 3.15g fiber, 3.15g protein, $0.24

Saturday Throwback: If I Had Known Then: Food and Financial Advice for the College-Bound (Also, a Story)

Every Saturday, we post a piece from the CHG archives. This one is from August 2008.

As summer draws to a close, gazillions of monumentally stoked 18-year-olds are preparing to leave the warmly comfy, comfy warmth of their hometowns for four years in cinderblock lecture halls. Yet college isn’t all reading, studying, and sporadically penning 25-page papers on FCC v. Pacifica (1978). It’s also occasion to figure stuff out – like how to seriously manage your adult life for the first time.

Fortunately for this blog, that adjustment period has much to do with frugality, food, and health. High school grads everywhere will soon be budgeting and cooking for themselves, and the initial months won’t be easy. I know, because once upon a time (the year 45 BC) I was there.

Looking back, I think I did okay. Still, there are quite a few CHG-type things I wish I had known before I left home. Like…

How to feed myself competently and frugally. My parents were excellent providers and decent cooks who fed us rounded meals from birth through late adolescence. Yet somehow, after 17 years, I never picked up on simple concepts like, “eat a vegetable, doofus,” or “an all-mozzarella stick diet will bankrupt, then KILL YOU.” If I had paid attention or done any research, the road to good health might have been an easier and cheaper one.

How to cook. In my small college town, it was ritual for students to eventually move out of the dorms and into run-down off-campus housing (owned by a landlord who worked nights as the anti-Christ). Of the eight kids who shared a single kitchen my junior year, only one knew what she was doing. The rest of us bought overpriced convenience food from the local superstore and/or made do with whatever she (note: me) could glean from her night job at the donut shop. In retrospect, an elementary grasp of basic cooking skills could have saved both time, money, and lots of donut indigestion.

How to avoid buying worthless junk. Every semester, I subsisted entirely on a few hundred dollars earned over summer or winter breaks. It was barely enough for textbooks and food. Yet, I still bought 14 tons of useless crap for no other reason than I COULD. Once, it was pair of vintage jeans. Another time, a Phish album (which, ew). And another time? I blew $7 on a vial of colored dust from a local tchotchke shop. To repeat, I spent SEVEN DOLLARS ON YELLOW DIRT. I wish I had read a finance book at that point, or even had any clue about maintaining a budget. At the very least, I wouldn’t have bought any beaker soil.

How to read nutrition labels. Oh man. How many muffins did I think contained only 220 calories, when it was actually more like 660? Duh.

How to care about my body in the right way. This is a tricky subject, because on the whole, universities are sadly rife with eating disorders. Too much self-scrutiny can land one in Bulimiatown, and too little will make the Freshman 15 seem like a fond memory. So, I’ll say this: I wish I had spent less time worrying about my weight (which nobody cared about half as much as I did), and more time investing in my health (which … it wouldn’t have hurt to hit the gym once or twice). Negative body images are endemic to teen girls – in America especially, and applying my energies the correct way (to eating right and exercise vs. stressing out about my butt) would have helped me greatly down the road.

I might also add “how to enjoy inexpensive beer” to this list, but I actually learned that part kind of quickly. And it still wasn’t half as valuable as the single best lesson I gleaned from my parents during college: namely, there are no second chances with real world money.

Let me explain.

Back in the spring of (DATE REDACTED), I was accepted to the aforementioned semi-affordable public institution in upstate New York, where the seven-month winters were matched in intensity only by my need to GET THE CRAP AWAY FROM HOME. I adored my Long Islander parents (and still do), but the prospect of living 400 miles away from them excited this lifelong Girl Scout to no end. So, I sent the “yes” letter, got my roommate assignment, and spent the rest of the summer earning textbook funds at the local Wendy’s fryolator.

For the most part, Ma and Pa were incredibly supportive. Besides making the obligatory trips to Bed, Bath, and Beyond for girly-blue shower caddies, they also offered to pay my tuition until my little sister entered school, two years hence. Being good parents and savvy businesspeople, they had one condition: I had to maintain a 3.0 average.

“No problem,” I thought. “Bs are easy.” I’d breezed through high school (for the most part - damn you, Physics), and wasn’t intimidated by the prospect of a higher, harder education. Subsequently, when I entered school in the fall, I devoted most of my time to … um … not schoolwork.

It went fine for the first few weeks, until I received a string of fairly awful grades on papers and tests. Those Cs (and in one or two cases, Ds) were both tremendously humbling and a serious wake-up call for my stupid (drunk) ass. So, I cut back on the excess, buckled down, and soon, most of my class marks had morphed into semi-respectable Bs and B-minuses.

Except Basic Musicianship.

Though the class was taught by the sweetest man alive, I didn’t understand a damn thing. Nor did I make any effort to, whatsoever. I missed a bare minimum of one class per week, never read the material, and probably took a combined total of three pages of notes. In retrospect, I’m surprised the professor didn’t hurl me out a window, smug attitude first.

By the end of the semester, I somehow pulled a C-minus out of the air (note: my butt). It was better than I deserved, but still brought my overall GPA down to a grand ol’ 2.99. (Seriously! A 2.99! I didn’t even know that was possible!) When my parents saw, I expected them to gush, “2.99! But that’s SO CLOSE to a 3.0! We’ll pay your tuition FOREVER.” To my then-consternation and their never-ending credit, that didn’t happen.

“Kid,” they said, “we asked for a 3.0. Here’s the bill.”

My callowness (and let’s be honest - newfound love of cheap beer) cost me upwards of $4,000, which I finally finished paying off last year, after more than a decade of interest had accrued. (P.S. I never got below a 3.3 again.)

But you know what? I’m glad it happened. I’m glad Ma and Pa stuck to their guns, because it taught me the three of the most valuable things I’ve ever learned:

1) There are no second chances with real world money.
2) There are no second chances with real world expectations.
3) My parents don’t mess around, ever.

Thanks to that inglorious 2.99, I pay bills on time. I don’t miss deadlines. I try to exceed what people ask of me. Sure, most of it’s out of sheer terror of the consequences, but I like to think I learned a microscopic smattering of responsibility along the way. (Note: It’s mostly the terror.)

Readers, how about you? Whether you went to college, your own apartment, or a marriage, what food/health/economic things did you wish you knew before leaving home? Bring on dem stories (and I promise next week, there’ll be an article with real research and actual learny-type things).

~~~

If you like this article, you might also dig:

• Cheap, Healthy College Food: Tips for Frugal, Nutritious Dining in the Dorm and Beyond
• 20 Cheap, Healthy Dishes Made From Ten Pantry Staples
• Frugal Food Hacks: 10 Tips to Simplifying Online Recipe Searches

(Photos courtesy of generalsarmory and lizblog.)

Top Ten Links of the Week: 9/3/10 - 9/9/10

Ed. Note: Sorry about the glitches. Thanks again for your patience.

1) NY Times Diner’s Journal: What If Restaurants Stopped Hiring Illegal Immigrants?
This post asks a touchy question at the heart of our country’s immigration quagmire: who will do our low-wage work? It is followed by some thought-provoking comments across the opinion spectrum.

2) Casual Kitchen: Breaking Your Own Frugality Rules
A lesson from just about every school of thought: You have to know the rules in order to break them. And as Dan sagely points out, once your frugality rules are in place, you have, by virtue of your good judgement, earned the right to break them as you see fit.

3) Treehugger: Local Cream Travels 340 Miles to Arrive Back at Its Own Doorstep
A creamery in the Cornwall ships its goods to a distribution center to Bristol which then sends them all over Britain, including Cornwall, where the clotted cream is labeled local. A Harris Teeter in North Carolina was busted labeling its Mexican tomatoes local. Caveat emptor, locavores.

4) NY Times: A Taste of Home in Foil Packets in Powder
via The Kitchn
This slide show takes a sobering look at what troops from around the world eat while in the field of battle. My youngest cousin began basic training on Tuesday. I hope she never sees one of these.

5) Science Daily: Commercial Organic Farms Have Better Fruit and Soil, Lower Environmental Impact, Study Finds
via The Consumerist
A study on California strawberries showed that the organic fruit beat out conventional in every category: taste, appearance, nutrition, shelf life, and soil diversity. Go hippies!

6) Treehugger: Adopt-a-Farmbox Builds Mini-Farms for NYC Schools
A green design firm is raising money to put mini-farms in inner-city schools to teach urban kids about agriculture and introduce them to produce they might not otherwise encounter regularly. More kids eating vegetables? Works for me!

7) Hyperbole and a Half: The Trouble with Coupons
While we love coupons at CHG headquarters, H & 1/2 reminds us that they are not appropriate in all situations.

8) Slate: How Does Booze Extend Your Lifespan?
A new University of Texas study shows that even heavy drinkers out live teetotalers, possibly because the alcohol increases good cholesterol (HDLs). And you don’t have to stick to red wine either. New data indicates that any booze will do.

9) Salon: The Burger that Won’t Rot
Just like Twinkies, Mickey D’s grub will apparently survive Armageddon; but it’s not just the salt. High fat and low moisture contents play big factors. Long live the Happy Meal?

10) Smithsonian: Spilling the Beans on the Origins of Food Idioms
via MaudNewton.com
A fun and fascinating read about the origin of many food-related idioms. I won’t spill the beans, but Shakespeare gets his props. Enjoy, you nutty kids.

HONORABLE MENTIONS
Lifehacker: Drink a Glass of Milk to Neutralize Garlic Breath
Similar to capsaicin, the chemical in chilies that burns your face off, garlic needs fat and water to wash it away. File under: who knew?

NY Times: Patient Money--Food Safety Tips for the Budget Conscious
A mostly common-sense but worth-reading collection of tips on food safety. It never hurts to be reminded, especially when food safety issues are in the news every other day.

Gizmodo: This Altoids Tin BBQ Grill Can Still Cook Dogs and Burgers
Cute! Fire me up a teeny veggie burg, please.

AND ALSO
Stuff You Missed in History Class
Sarah Dowdy and Katie Lambert host this fun and fascinating podcast that covers topics from sad royal children and historical ghosts to medieval torture devices and lost treasure. I’ve been listening weekly for over a year and fill the gaps in my week with the back catalog. Greatest hits include "Into the Ghastly Blank with Burke and Wills," "How Gandhi's Salt March Worked," "What Happened to Cleopatra's Children?", and "Did Marie Antoinette Really Tell French Peasants to Eat Cake?"

Thank you so much for visiting Cheap Healthy Good! (We appreciate it muchly). If you’d like to further support CHG, subscribe to our RSS feed! Or become a Facebook friend! Or check out our Twitter! Or buy something inexpensive, yet fulfilling via that Amazon store (on the left)! Bookmarking sites and links are nice, too. Viva la France!